Bout time.

I had one of the best weekends I've had in a while this weekend. It was all the right parts relaxing and fun and interesting, and different.

Friday night I went to Jen Brown's apartment in Brooklyn and had a great time at our Olympics-themed shabbat dinner. Although there was much more Olympia than Shabbat, thankfully. It was great to see everyone, and it was fun to be those loud obnoxious kids on the subway on the way home.

Unfortunately on Saturday I had to go back to New Ro for the afternoon to start the task of cleaning out the Gumdrop. My dad's planning on moving out some time in June or July. No one's happy about it, him included, but it's time, so we're doing it. A lot of my stuff from when I was a kid is going to get donated to hospitals and stuff, so I feel good about that, but I don't really want to leave the house. It's been good to me, and it will feel wierd not to have a real home base. But fear not, Captain Fantastic already has a new home at Sean's house, so Elton and I won't have to be seperated. Anyway, come this Spring there will be a fantastic opportunity for everyone to buy my old stuff at a tag sale. In the meantime, feel free to drive by on the weekends and see what we've thrown out. This past week we enjoyed carving up my bat-mitzvah sign-in board and tossing it out the attic window and onto the driveway below. Anyway, the process of moving out is going to suck, and I haven't really dealt with it, but c'est la vie.

Onto happier parts of the weekend, Saturday night I went uptown to Eli's housewarming party. It was quite an adventure to go up to Harlem alone at 11 at night in a blizzard, since I'd only been to his apartment once before, and it was not in white-out conditions. But the party was a lot of fun. Olivia was there, who I hadn't really seen in years. We have a lot more in common than just a less-than-thrilling ex-boyfriend and it was great to hang out and catch up. And play a thrilling game of ridiculous scrabble. When she and Eli walked me back to the subway at 3 am and we spent 15 minutes on the corner of 116th and Frederick Douglass Boulevard talking to just about everybody who walked by. We were told the merits of pot over cigarettes (it costs you less in the long-run, according to the old philosopher) and got an impromptu concert from someone who I swore was a dude until the end of the concert when she introducted herself as Josephine. Rock on, Josephine. All in all, I give Harlem two hearty thumbs up and look foward to returning there soon.

Of course by the time I left Eli's, it had been snowing for hours, and there was a good 3 or 4 inches on the ground. I crawled into bed with S and when we woke up at ten there was at least a good foot on the ground. This of course called for an adventure. After a lovely filling breakfast at Manatus, we went on a trek to SoHo. Normally a ten minute walk, yesterday it took us easily 45 minutes. We tried to go to the Puma store to buy awesome jeans, but the store, while fully staffed, was locked. So we consoled ourselves at Vosges and drowned our tears in vials of exceedingly expensive and delicious hot chocolate. I also got him a valentine's day present. because eventhough I think Valentine's day is a load of hooey (ha! hooey!) I always enjoy an opportunity to get him something that he enjoys, and maybe even is tasty. So that was fun. We went back to the apartment and watched Coffee and Cigarettes but discovered that it was a much better movie to nap to than to actually watch. But I love naps, and I rarely get to have a co-napper since S isn't much of a napper, but I think in this case mono worked in my favor. So we napped for a couple of hours, hung out and basked in the glory of the TiVo, commiserated about the misery of canker sores, ate burritos and went to sleep. All in all, a great weekend.

Israel wrap up, for those of you who wanted to know

So I will have been back from Israel two weeks tomorrow. I suppose this is as good a time as any to wrap up the trip, since I just uploaded all my photos onto Flickr

So all in all, I have to say that in retrospect, I had a good time. While I was there, I was homesick like mad, probably more home sick than I've ever been before, but I came out of the trip with some great new friends, and saw things that I've never seen before, which is always enjoyable. I think the best thing that I got out of the trip were my friends. I have seen people from the trip both weekends I have been home, and will see them again this coming weekend. It feels great to really have a crew again, I haven't had that since Smith, and that really has been the only thing I've missed about college. I really feel like I have the opportunity to keep getting to know these people, and it's exciting. I digress. I'm supposed to be talking about the trip.

So, I think that it got off to a rough start because we started the trip in the middle of fucking nowhere. We spent two days in the middle of the desert at Mitzpeh Ramon, a town centered around a military base and an inferior crater (inferior because it was not caused by an asteriod, not because it was lacking in size.) So, I felt sort of lost there. The first night I woke up in the middle of the night, I had no idea what time it was, no idea where I was, and I bugged out. I called Sean in a panic and learned that it was 4:30 am in Israel and that I was, indeed, in a former military base whose owners could not spell the name of their hotel coorectly (I was informed that I was not staying in the "Clab Ramon" as the sign next to the door claimed, but instead the "Club Ramon," an only slightly more logical name. There was nothing club-like about the place. But after this conversation my nerves were significantly calmer and I started to loosen up a bit. But I think the fact that the next morning began 12 hours of high intensity Jewish goodness, I got a little bitter again. Schwarma eventually calmed my nerves on this front.

Anyway, after the initial bout of homesickness things got better. It remained somewhat, but by and large I dealt with it. And as I said, I made friends, and it made the trip so much better. I don't feel like going into details about every day. I came on the trip with a cynical outlook on the thing. I know that the trip is designed to make you love Israel, and I certainly don't hate it, but I won't be returning any time soon, either. Like I said, the best thing I got out of it was definitely the friendships.

After the trip ended I spent a few days with Rena. It was great to see her, and to play with Asher, and meet everyone who's important in her life there. It was nice to see the way that life really is in Israel, as opposed to the way Birthright shows it during those crazy ten days. Karen and I had a good time together and I'm looking foward to her being in NY next year so we can get into some trouble.

So yeah, I think that's just about it. Hope everyone found that enlightening.

The Holy Land?

So I'm off for two and a half weeks of fun and trouble making in Israel tomorrow. I am nervous, but only because I have psyched myself out and have decided that everyone on my trip is going to be horribly JAPpy, judgemental and mean. I know this is unfair. But, in my own defense, the last time I spent any amount of unadulterated time with a large group of Jewish people of my own age was at Ken-Wood, and let's be real, it doesn't get more JAPpy, judgemental and mean than Ken-Wood. And Ken-Mont. Which isn't to say that I wasn't completely happy there, because I was, but I am apprehensive of it being a similar mileiu, which I think is not completely unfounded. So the first ten days are supposed to be this life changing expereince. I don't have any interest in having my life changed (at least not religiously). I am apprehensive about this aspect as well. I know that the point of the trip is to make you love Israel, and I can understand that, but I hate guitar sing-in NFTY-type of events with a burning passion and I have a feeling that that might be the major way that they go about trying to convince you that we all should move to Israel for good. Further, I anticipate being a godless heathen in this group will put me in the minority. But who knows. Perhaps I'll be pleasantly suprised and EVERYONE on the trip will be godless heathens. One can only hope.

But, of course, the real reason I'm going is to see Rena, who also happens to be the reason that I even have this blog in the first place. So the last 7 days pf my stay will be filled with unadulterated insanity and goodness. and Puppy! So maybe I'll check in once I'm at Rena's, since she's going to have classes in the mornings, but maybe not. Let's be real, my readership is tiny and I like it that way, so it's not like it matters.

So, here I go....

It was actually a nice day.

So, for the first time in 7 years, my birthday was uniformly great. I heard from all sorts of people who I love and adore, and some who I hadn't heard from in a loooooooooong time, and Someone Who's Real Cute baked me a yellow cake with chocolate frosting. No one has baked me a cake since I was like 5 and it was so sweet and also tasty. He also got me this and we played with it, shot a roll of film and dropped it off to be developed. However, I had no idea how expensive printing it is! The film is medium format and there are 12 or 16 shots on a roll, depending, and it's $20 just for a contact sheet, and even worse, $3 for each print. EACH! So I told the guy in the camera shop to just develop the negatives. The camera is finnicky, has a ton of light leaks, perhaps most importantly the entire back fell off of it at one point. So it's possible that nothing will come out. Which would be sad. But I have lots of film and I am really excited to learn how to use this camera and make real photos with it. I'm thinking about taking it to Israel, I think it would be a good thing. I am also thinking that turning my bathroom into a darkroom would be a reallllly good idea, considering the price of developing, etc. At least I could process the film on my own and then decide what to print. Finally, having no window in my bathroom has a benefit.

I normally hate my birthday for understandable reasons, but I really took efforts to turn that around, and I think that it actually paid off. Mind over matter, I suppose. To further that point, I'm actually having a party this year. I am a small bit nervous that no one will come, a point being furthered by a possibly imminent transit strike, but even if there is a strike I am hoping that no matter who comes it will be a good time. Even if it's a small party, a party is a party and it will be fun. I am trying to keep a good outlook on these things. I think I just am thinking too hard about it because I am bored. Someone recently told me that they think it is harder to be bored at work than to be busy and engaged. I would certainly agree with that. But next Tuesday will mark one year since I started this job, and hopefully things will begin to work for me as I'd like them to here.

Here's to another year, I know this one will be even better than the last.

Ugh

And I just got cat call number four. I didn't kick the dude, as promised, since he was SIGNIFICANTLY larger than I was, but I did scream the shit out of him.

What is with today, today, people?! GOD DAMN.

Ew, take two.

I've been cat called 3 times already today, each one more icky than the last. If I hear one more comment about my "hot ass" I'm gonna kick said offender in the balls. To that end, see the above link.

Ew

Being lazy, I did not eat breakfast in my apartment this morning, I ate it at work. A little yogurt a little granola, a little honey, life is good, right? Wrong. The yogurt definitely spent the weekend next to veggie cream cheese, and took on its flavor. Gross. I never want to eat again.

-Post cut short, big boss just arrived from Atlanta.

At least it was something to do

I got an email yesterday telling me that I had until today to fill out my employee self-review, which came as news to me, since I thought I had done it months ago. I just spent an hour on it, being really thoughtful and trying to make myself sound super duper, only to be told by a co-worker that we were erroniously copied on a CNN email. Super. As annoying as doing that was, it was nice to have something to do. In a similar vein, I applied to a job off Craig's List yesterday, for a position at a new network devoted to food and I wrote this cover letter that tried to convey how super I am, we'll see if it worked. I mean, it was witty, snarky in all the right spots, and well written. Hopefully, something will come of it. (bonus: even if I don't get a job, somewhere else to get my cooking show fix while that dumb bitch Rachael Ray is on foodtv.) But both of these things just remind me that I really do enjoy writing and it would be great if I could get a job that would allow me to think creatively and do something productive with my time. I think that's all I need to be satisfied just something that lets me feel stimulated from time to time. I mean, that and a $20,000 pay raise would be super, too.

But, at least it's Friday. I don't have any definite plans for this weekend, I got an email from the Brooklyn crew about a concert over there tonight, which might be fun. All these thoughts about a birthday and who I would invite has really made me realize that while I haven't made any super close friends in the city, and certainly no friends at work, I do have a whole lot of random friends all over the city who I would love to see at any given time. I need to be more proactive about making plans with people. I don't ever really feel lonely, which admitedly is largely thanks to S (and believe me I don't know what I would do without him), but I don't think it would be a bad thing if I tried to make what is now mostly casual friendships into a few that are a bit more concrete. It's funny, while I was at Smith, I often found myself thinking or saying that I really didn't need any more friends, I felt that I had enough, and was more than satisfied with who I had. And those friendships still are among my closest and my best. Sadly, they're all in Boston, or in some cases even further. I don't feel that cliche that people often do about being in the center of the universe and feeling all alone, thankfully, but I think that getting myself a bit more together on the friends front is certainly within the realm of possibility for me. Not a bad thing, no? So, onto another weekend, and another chance at some fun in the city. And with new glasses, to boot. Life's good.

Let's make it interactive!

Okay, now that my cover has been blown, and Kate has linked my ass on her blog, it's time to make this bitch interactive. I figure that my readership will go from Sean and Rena (Rena is even questionable) to whoever is attentive to kate's links. So here's the issue: I have approximately 15 days until I turn 23. Gag. I'm too young to be 23. But, that brings up the eternal question-What do I want for my birthday???

Here are my thoughts thus far:

A long down coat to keep my ass warm so I dont' get any more colds
A new ipod (which can be traded in for cash to be used toward loose women and liquor with Dmo)
Money for Israel (totally unoriginal and unnecessary)

Ok. Those are all of my ideas. I don't really like any of them, with the exception of the first, but I hate asking for clothes for my birthday. I enjoy getting something frivolous and useless which i would never ever ask for otherwise. Although a floor length down coat does fit within those parameters.

So here's part two of this question (and where my birthday being in December comes in handy):
What are YOU asking for for Christmas? Inspire me!

And Part 3: anyone know any good bars for throwing a birthday fete at? Keep in mind, this is going to be my first real birthday party since I was 16 and I want it to be chill.

Okay, interactive. let's go!

Smooth

I came to work today with my shirt on backwards. But at least the dude giving out the free newspapers on Christopher Street said I look cheerful. I do so enjoy being a mess.

But...in a moment of non-messiness, pictures from the wedding, at which Sean and I looked impeccably put together. (PS-on the first one, what's with the guy looking at me?)

Friday!

Finally this very odd week is almost over. I feel like I was tricked into coming today. Stupid Action saying he's not coming and then saying he's coming and then getting to work this morning and having a voicemail that he wasn't coming, so ridiculous. I was on the subway this morning and thought to myself "there's going to be a voicemail from him when you get there." I could have stayed in bed. I should have stayed in bed. Whatever, I'll just leave early, take a nap, clean my apartment for when Stinky comes tomorrow and then go out and have fun. I'm looking foward to seeing Vickie again, and who doesn't love a night of East Village bar hopping? I'm just writing in this because it's too early for anyone else to be online, or even awake. This is just cruel and unusual punishment, this job. But the Turner jobs website seems to be working again and I've been applying for new things for the last couple days. Hopefully, one will pull through. That would be great.
Okay, I'm ready to go home and get back into bed.

Would you still love me....

This just needs to be posted, and it's best when it's shown without ANY explanation whatsoever.

I love Grad School.

So, as promised, I went and bought a GRE book last night. I went with S to shake shack, fortified myself with cheeseburgers against the impending stress and went to B&N and bought myself a GRE prep book. Hundreds of pages of math problems, practice tests, and vocab words. But the grad school application process is now a group effort and I look foward to studying like mad while S makes the internet his bitch. I'm feeling good about the prospect of this, but I'm still not going to start studying until this afternoon.

This might require a lot of cheeseburgers.

My desk makes me anxious

I'm so conflicted about my future. But only in the employment sense. At this point, I really feel like it's impossible for me to find a job in which I'll really be happy. So I want to go to grad school, because I just don't feel like a BA is enough to really be successful, which is insane if you think about it, and I don't know if that's really true, or if I'm just a striver. I really miss the academic environment, and I hate that the most stimulation that I get out of a workday is doing a crossword puzzle online. I didn't think it was possible to miss have course readers, but I do. So eventually, grad school it is. But that requires taking the GRE, right? And I haven't taken math since high school. That's like, a lifetime ago. So how am I going to get into grad school if I have a crap GRE score? So I keep not taking it, because I'm petrified of math, but the longer I wait, the more I forget that a squared + b squared = c squared. Actually, that's about the only math I remember at this point. And then, even if I do apply, what if I don't get in? And then I'm really stuck in a boring job forever. See, this is what really gets to me, I feel like I'm stuck in this horrible environment, and I hate it, but I don't know how to get out of it, because I don't know what I ultimately want to do, so even grad school is just pushing this same feeling off, I will come back to it in three years. Like going to Tisch is even going to get me out of this. It's feelings like this that just make me want to jump ship, leave NY altogether. I guess all I can do is buy a gre book and prepare. I guess that would be a good thing to do while I'm bored at work, since I have all day to do whatever I want. I could just sit and study, it would help with the boredom, I guess. So maybe that's a plan. Go down to borders, buy a book, study while I'm bored, take it, get in to Tisch, and not worry what I'm going to do with my life for the next three years.

But then, which Tisch program do I apply to? The cinema studies one, which basically means that I have to become a professor, since I can't think of what else I would do, or the film preservation one, which sounds like so much fun, and spend my life in a museum with old movies. Oh, that pretty much sounds perfect, right? I don't know, that's what I've been thinking this week, that I want to spend the rest of my life playing with old film. It just sounds so interesting, and gratifying, and perfect.

I should buy a GRE book. I'll do that today.

Who's dumber? The terrorists or the police? Let's find out!

There were cops in the subway this morning checking people's bags, supposedly. The table aws clean and it looked as if they hadn't stopped anyone for a while. They looked at me funny but let me go.

Do they really think the West Village homos are a threat?

The whole thing is ridiculous. I have found that I'm often bracing myself for the worst while at work. And not from Action, either.

How's that for a first real post?

That's my face!

pic08-1
Originally uploaded by smee32.